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March 13, 2007

What Does Divorce Mean for Our Families

As a child of divorce I know how heart-breaking it is for family, friends and the kids. I remember when my biological parents divorced - mom and dad when I was about 9. My grandmother died and my dog was run over by a truck passing by. Can we say trama. The divorce seemed to be the one thing that I could fix, there was hope.

What I didn't know was that there was much more going on under the surface. They had fallen out of love. And mom had moved on. Soon after Mom met Sue. Mom and Dad had been together just about 10 years, Mom and Sue have been together 22.

Mom followed love not gender. The two need to be separated when we look at gay divorce. The big difference is that kids are protected in a legal marriage. What happens when our parents fall out of love and then the courts fall out of recognition of their relationship.

This story may be unfolding in various locales, but it is making headlines in the DC area. Two mom's now begin the fight for the child. Unleashing all the anger that can sometimes be found in a divorce, but under a national spotlight. Being watch by a country that is comapring their story to others and making assumptions about gay marriages.

All I have to say about the article is it starts out shocking quite open, but I feel for Isabella. It seems that like the Hatfield and the McCoys. Take a look here

March 12, 2007


COLAGE member Melanie Jones in the News. Great article Melanie. Click here to read article

Transitioning with Your Family

Do you think that for Travis, this situation could have been better handled?

With the mayor at his side, longtime Largo City, Florida Manager Steve Stanton disclosed to the St. Petersburg Times on Wednesday that he is undergoing hormone therapy and counseling in preparation for a sex-change operation.
Through the process, which could take well over a year, Stanton plans to remain as the chief executive of the city of 76,000. He has the support of Mayor Pat Gerard, elected last March.
"He's a dedicated city manager and puts his job first," said Gerard, who learned of the decision Jan. 1.
Stanton, 48, said he eventually will change his name to Susan, the name his late mother would have given him if he had been a girl.
Married with a 13-year-old son, Stanton said he has thought of becoming a woman since childhood. He said he has gone out in public as a woman in recent years, but only in places like Orlando, Atlanta and Chicago.
Stanton had planned to announce his decision in June so his son could be out of town. But that changed this week after the Times heard of possible changes in Stanton's life and approached him. He and Gerard described in detail his decision and plans Wednesday morning.

Steven Stanton on Talking to his Son, Travis

There was a lot of discussion about my insensitivity to my son’s needs. Everybody thought that he learned from the news media. He did not learn from the news media. He learned from mom and dad that night sitting in our living room. We talked about courage, we talked about conviction, we talked about doing something that was so personally sensitive that his daddy had been struggling with as a very small boy.

We talked about the inside growing up and matching the outside and that I was going through the process of trying to make the outside and the inside the same. And we talked about the core values that make people, people and make a dad, a dad and make a relationship between the son and the father sustainable over time irrespective of one’s gender. And he’s been great. He has been super, he has not missed a day at school, he’s not missed an hour of school.