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Marriage Misgivings

I've got marriage on the mind...

It feels like everyone does these days. Last weekend at Creating Change everyone was talking about marriage. This morning Noel shared his conflicted views on having a wedding with his wife. Lately, marriage seems to underscore every queer conversation.

As queerspawn, we engage with the marriage debate continuously for ourselves, our parents and our friends. While Noel and I personally identify differently (he=straight, me=dyke) it is not surprising that we share similar misgivings.

"I've always dreaded having a traditional wedding where one side of the aisle was filled with WASPS and/or Catholics and the other side is filled with all my faggot family — a sort of contemporary Montagues v. Capulets — and the imagined tension of having to explain, play pronoun rodeo, etc. "

Sadly, that feels like every wedding/major-family-function. Me, my gay brother and our ever-supportive Mom up against it all. If I ever do have a wedding, I'm plagued with the thought of the discomfort between my half-queer/half-Catholic family and my mythical partner's statistically probable straight family. I know it should be revolutionary, but most of the time that picture makes me nervous.

Of course there's way more to unpack in "marriage" and "weddings"... more to come.
Meanwhile, continue the discussion on Noel's site...


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